His first camp

Am I going to be having peace of mind in the next 3 days 2 nights? Well, it certainly going to be a lot quieter without him around. 

For the first time in almost 13 years, he's gonna be away from home, and for quite long too, 3 days and 2 nights.  

The motherly side of me would be missing him a great deal. That's not surprising at all as he's been with me most of the time ever since he's born. I could also be worried about whether he's having proper meals and what not. 

On the other hand, I really NEED A BREAK. For the next 3 days, at least, I don't have to think what's his meals are, whether he's going to be fussy with his food. I don't need to be bothered if he's on the computer, playing games or if he's with his gadget. I think I won't be peeking into his room the first thing in the morning as soon as I wake up to see if this boy is awake with his gadget or downstairs in front of the TV.  And the daily ritual of Kumon drilling, that will be forgotten for a while. No more questioning and reminding if he's completed his homework. Ahhh... I think this is more of a time-out for Mom than for him. 

For the first time, I'm for this kind of camp.  He needs this kind of exposure, considering his 'not-so-independent' attitude.  He's definitely going to mingle with his friends and learn to get along harmoniously with them.  He's to get physical a little instead of being a couch potato or a mouse potato, not to mention other skills which this camp is supposed to teach the participants.  

Mom can definitely relax for a while. 

Fruits of his labour

Yes! He got straight As in the UPSR!

He could finally taste the fruits of his own labour. The few weeks of sweat and tears were worth the accolade he earns.  He did not really do consistently well in some of the subjects (especially the national language) but with close guidance and monitoring, he peaked in the end!

It was not a smooth-sailing journey as he left his vernacular school for a national controlled school with higher standard in the national language subject.  In about one and a half years, he mastered the language and scored a distinction in the first major examination of primary school. 

Wyng, proudly holding his UPSR result slip, with the principal, Mr Xavier and BM teacher, Encik Ikhwan.

Wyng, along with 10 other straight As scorers of the school.

First day in secondary school

Daddy said Wyng in this photo does not really look like him in person. To me, it does.  Here, he's in his new uniform on the first day of school in secondary years.

He's going to be in a totally new environment with new friends.  He has to start all over again to form his circle of friends as none of his former classmates are going to this school.

He's a little uncomfortable with this idea but I'm quite sure he should be able to adjust pretty fast as with his all other previous schools.

All the best, Wyng!

I convinced him not to quit - Part 1

I remember drafting this post from my gmail account and sent it to my blogger account on 11 April this year. And, I was glad I documented my conversation with Hoe. After some editing, I am publishing it now, more than 6 months after it happened.

Another bombshell...he broke the news to me. Still in his school pants, half-naked after coming back from school, he was sitting at the staircase trying to catch a moment with me while I was rushing through my dinner before my tuition class with my students.

"Can you do me a favour?"
This question didn't sound good at all.  At that moment, I knew something must have gone really wrong. 

"Can you write a letter to school saying I want to quit IGCSE?"

"Why!"

"I cannot cope. I don't want to waste your money."

"Paying for education is not a waste of money. And, you don't decide that it's wasting our money. What happened?"

"I just don't want to waste your money."

"What happened? What's wrong!"
It was not a tone of concern. Rather it was an impatient tone, searching the truth.

"I can't cope. There's a lot of homework. This teacher gives a lot of homework."

"Why can't you cope when you hardly do your homework? It's not that you stay up until 11pm or midnight to do your homework. What nonsense is this?"

"She asks us to do a lot of work and I can't cope. She walks in and say things like, I don't know what to give you all. Do this..."

"It's not that you can't cope. You are just plain lazy and you are finding excuse to avoid extra work. So, you 

choose to quit."

"IGCSE is a very important subject. You qualify to take it and not many people can enjoy this privilege.

English is your strong subject and now you want to quit."  

"What else are you left with?  You should quit English Lit or other non-core subjects, not IGCSE. People pay a lot to sit for this exam and you want to quit?"

"I will not let you quit." I was very firm.

"If I have to go and see your teacher and Mr Wong to make sure you attend your class, I will do it."

"What about the first class you joined? The teacher kicked you out of this class. Will she accept you back

into her class?"

"I don't know. If can, I want to go back to Puan N."

"She gives you all less homework?"

"Yes."

"You go and see her. Talk to her nicely and politely whether she can accept you back into her class. Never badmouth your teacher in front of Puan N. Just say you want to go back to her because you can't cope with Puan R. If she refuses, then I will go and see her."

"You have to change your attitude. Youngsters change when they are 16.  You don't seem to change for the 

better. "They mature and know what they want as they reach Form 4. But, you are still the same. You always avoid work."

"Don't regret in future."

It was the usual squabble with him. Each such session with him is never easy. I have to relentlessly emphasize

a point. Repeating my message, again and again. It ended with somehow, an expected silence from him. I will take that as an agreement from him to either talk to Puan N or continue on with his usual class.

When things cooled down, I went to him room and speak to him in a comforting tone. 

"Hard work always pays off." 

Whether he listens and decides to turn over a new leaf is yet to be seen. I was greeted with silence, which can be interpreted as something positive. He was at his desk, taking out a few exercise books, as though ready to complete his backlog (I suppose it's backlog as he never does his work).

All I know is I will continue to be by his side to 'remind' him relentlessly.  

I can finally keep his iPod

He finally surrendered his iPod to me.  Breaking his first promise late last year of letting me keep his iPod during the weekdays, this time he had no more excuses.  He was made to agree that his iPod will not be his close companion during the weekdays if he fails to achieve reasonably good result in his first term tests.

As expected, he wasn't able to perform (again, academically) up to expectation.  After a few stern reminders, he had to surrender his gadget to me for safekeeping.  He even bargained that he would be giving it to me on Monday morning when I asked for it on Sunday night.  What difference does it make? Huge difference for him, I suppose.

I hope he will keep his promise and would not 'steal' the gadget from me.  It's now in a secret hiding place, a safe one, I hope.

Am I doing too much for my kid?

Tomorrow is the last day of the PMR exam.  After tomorrow, it will be havoc for our home as Hoe will be declared 'free' from the major exam, for at least another year.

Wyng's last day of the final year exam will be on Tuesday. So, which means Tuesday afternoon will spell a topsy turvy home come afternoon when Wyng reaches home from school.  Hoe will be off on Tuesday as he doesn't need to sit for the Chinese Paper.

As of now when I'm blogging this, I've just completed a marathon of downloading and scanning sets of questions for Hoe to do.  It was a last-minute thing to do as I notice Hoe wasn't very strong in this Living Skills paper.  And, I've just discovered (after he told me yesterday) that he does not have any model papers except for the sets of questions from his school.  From what I gather, he doesn't seem to be able to achieve A for each set of papers he completes.

It was only yesterday that he requested me to download answers to a few sets of the other states' previous years' trial sets.  After a few unsuccessful attempts, I gave up.  His teacher gave the students questions without answers! So, instead of continuing the fruitless attempts, I volunteered to download the current year's trial papers of other states for him to do.  All in, I've downloaded questions from five states for him.  Sigh..each set took about half an hour to do, excluding downloading time.

Even Hoe said I'm too enthusiastic and diligent downloading the papers.  I hope Mom is not too overly diligent in this case as Hoe is the one sitting for the exam.  I told him he had deprived me of my weekend relaxing.  "Sorry, sorry.." Hoe kind of murmured apologetically.   " I just want hard work from you, not a sorry." was all I could say.

I can't believe Mom is sewing

It's eye-straining, it's finger-pricking. Something I don't enjoy doing now at my age. I can't even thread the needle as easily as how I used to do it 5 years ago. I'd rather leave this mountaineous task (I mean just the needle threading part, to Hoe).  It's not about saving a few ringgit to get his pants altered just because it's too long.  It's about convenience at the right time.  This is always required urgently on weekends when the next day is a school day. Somehow, holes always must be mended on weekends and not earlier.  So, it leaves Mom with no choice but to fulfill this motherly responsibility. If I have a choice, I'd rather have a heart-to-heart conversation or a revision session with the kids than doing this sewing stuff. It's best left to the expert who can just do this in the blink of an eye, effortlessly.

He's settling down very well

Familiarizing himself with his new school

Making sure he knows where to wait for his transport home

The school's temporary canteen while the new one is under contruction

Waiting place for parents

Settling Wyng in his new school was not a problem at all, much to Mom's relief.

I didn't even need to accompany him on the first day at this new school.  After meeting his form teacher and sending him to his new class, I had prepared to spend at least half or one day at his new school, thinking of helping him to settle down or familiarize with the new environment.

When I returned to his class after buying him some new workbooks and other stuff, he was already in "good hands".  He had an assistant, helping him to write his name on his new exercise books.  His enthusiastic classmate seated behind him gestured to me to let him join Scouts when I asked Wyng whether he prefers Scouts or St. John's.

He even has a guide to show him around the new school.  His new classmate even told me which is the shorter way to the male toilet when I went to visit him during recess.  Wyng is definitely not lost and well taken-care of, I was assured when I saw his classmate taking him to the canteen during recess.  He had suggested that I went home as he didn't need me to be around anymore.

By the second day, he seems to have familiarized himself with the new environment.

My digital dictionary is the best

Before I went hunting for a digital dictionary for my kid, in the market, the features I'd like to have in it are:

* meaning of words in English explained in Chinese
* meaning of words in Chinese explained in Chinese, English and Bahasa Malaysia
* a speaker so that words in Chinese can be pronounced and learnt by my kids
* inclusion of words (in all the 3 languages) found in dictionaries with the highest number of words

I'd done a simple verbal research on the type of dictionary available and their pricing.

Games is the last thing I want but as the promoter was showing me the features of the gadget, I was told that those in the dictionary are actually 'educational' Math games which stimulate the mind.  I'm left with no choice as those games are indeletable from the gadget.

The short demo of the gadget is an eye-opener for me.  Apart from the fundamental explanation of words in the 3 main languages, little did I know that digital dictionaries nowadays are equipped with so many additional features:

* meaning of words for 24 other foreign languages
* translation (of phrases) from English to Chinese and vice versa
* proverbs (English)
* idioms (Chinese)
* antonyms and synonyms (Chinese and English)
* English phrasal verbs (with explanation in both English and Chinese)
* picture dictionary (of certain words only). There are also pictures of particular items such as market, city, school, occupations, parts of body etc identified by the 3 main languages with pronounciation
* scientific and technology as well as mathematical terms
* learning modules where academic questions in the 3 languages are also loaded together. So far, I've discovered that there are the language papers but yet to explore further to discover more.

I was pleasantly surprised that one can even watch a movie and play songs using this educational device.

All the above functionalities are available at the price of below RM800 (USD258) for an Apple Tree's Xplain.  I have no regrets buying this.  I told my other half not to let both the kids know about the device's multi-media capabilities.  Though sooner or later they will discover, I prefer to keep this a secret for as long as possible to avoid headaches.

Why are these food banned in school?

Fattening food such as nugget and french fries are banned in school canteens but nasi lemak is allowed to be sold.  What logic is this?

Nasi lemak has calories of 644 while a piece of chicken nugget is 48 calories whereas french fries (say small serving of 85g) is 271 calories. Even if a child eats 5 pieces of nugget and still have the stomach to take another serving of french fries, calories count is only 511, still less than that of a packet of nasi lemak.

Realistically, with just about 15-20 minutes of recess, a primary student may most likely buy either nuggets or fries and not both western food (queueing up time has to be taken into consideration).  So, the calories count will be most probably less than 511 . Comparing this to a smaller serving of nasi lemak (which a child can normally take), the difference is not that significant.

So, I still don't see a better rationale to ban the western food but not the coconut rice.

Looking to buy a digital dictionary

I used to object buying a digital dictionary for my kid with the reason that the dictionary may not provide an accurate word for different situations.  I could be too cost-conscious then or anti-gadget in terms of providing a tool to aid Hoe when he was a young.

Well, somehow my perception changes.  After being in the education field for a few years, I notice almost 100% of kids from the national type school owns a digital dictionary.  I also realise that at primary level, this kind of dictionary is a very handy tool to help students improve their vocabulary of other languages, Malay and English.  Of course, the traditional book dictionary undoubtedly still serves its purpose. But, in terms of popularity, speed and convenience, the digital gadget certainly is more superior.

Unless my understanding is incorrect, the conventional dictionary uses 'bu sou' (root word) to search for a chinese character.  When I was learning how to use Mandarin to sms, I got to know that hanyi pinyin is used.  So, for a digital gadget, I believe hanyi pinyin is to be used to search for a word.

I think using hanyi pinyin is an easier way than using the former.  What if the student does not know the 'bu sou'? Most of the time, they know how to pronounce or say the word but do not know the stroke of the chinese character.

Recognising this plus-point, I am now open to buying one for Wyng.  I just don't want him to be lazy or give up when he encounter certain characters which he doesn't understand or when he needs to construct sentences but does not know how to write them.  On top of that, Mom can also make use of the digital dictionary for use in her teaching.

Perhaps, if a second-hand one is available for a reasonable price, Mom will definitely not think twice to buy.

A new system in school

Beginning this year, Wyng's school implemented this system which Mom cringes as this was exactly the system which made Mom decided not to enrol Wyng in his older brother's primary school.  This system, which is implemented by most Chinese medium schools, requires their students to stay back after their normal school hours to attend tuition classes.  Depending on school, some schools require them to stay back until 3.30, 3.15 or 4pm.  Wyng's school chooses to dismiss them at an unearthly 4 o'clock.

At only Primary 3, I strongly disagree that he attends all those tuition classes for an additional 3 hours after school.  Already exhausted after 5 hours in school, packing another 3 hours (what! eight long hours) in the same environment, with almost the same teachers is not proven to have any positive impact on the children's learning capabilities.  In view of this, I promptly went to see the Assistant Principal of the school to submit my application to have him exempted from the classes.

It wasn't difficult for me to convince the school that Wyng is better guided by his Mom as he is an above average student, being in the top 25 in his school.  According the the school, the system is started with the aim of keeping the students occupied productively after school hours.  But, why only curriculum is emphasized in this system?  There is only an hour of co-curriculum in the entire 'extra' classes.

I am not sure if the school has conducted any research to prove that the extra after-school hours can actually help students to excel.  Whatever it is, I don't doubt that the school has failed to consider the fact that not all students need to be 'educated' the same way.

Now, instead of clocking in 7.20am to 4pm on a daily basis, Wyng can be dismissed at 1.10 pm on Mondays to Tuesdays and 12.40pm from Wednesdays to Fridays.  He has his hearty lunch, finishes his homework after that and for the rest of the day, he either watches television, plays, does his reading or attends his Chinese or Kumon classes.

What's wrong with this? Nothing wrong at all and he will continue to enjoy such routine at least for another two more years.

Back to school

The first week of school has flown past. As Wyng is in Standard 3 this year, there isn't many problems associated with resistance to go to school or stuff like that.  Wyng has to adapt to morning session. Same for Mom.

Transport has been arranged and all the rest.  What's new this year was I have to submit an application letter to exempt him from after-school tuition, similar to what I did for Hoe.  After spending a few hours in school, I got what I wanted done.

I'll blog more of my 'accomplishments' of the few hours I spent in this school later.

He's luckier than his older brother

This was posted on 13 November 2008 in my previous blog. Here is a reposting.

This is his second trip in less than 3 months. How lucky is he? His first excursion was to High 5 bread factory in Shah Alam. When he came back, he told me lots of bread-making stories. His animated gestures amuses me.


Yesterday, I allowed him to join his school to Aquaria,KLCC. He told me a little fish story, not too much though. But, I think he enjoys the trip. None of us in the family has been to Aquaria yet. So, he's very fortunate. By the way, when I asked him again about his adventure to Aquaria, he told me dissatisfactorily that his friends pushed him away and wouldn't allow him to watch the fish.

Compared to Wyng, Hoe wasn't as lucky. When he was at Wyng's age (he's 5 now), I'd never allow him to join any outdoor trip organised by the school. He was our 'jewel of the eye' then. And, we just find him too petite and fragile to be allowed to venture out of school compound even though we were assured of security and what not. I don't take any risk at all with Hoe.

Hence, he had NEVER joined any trip in his kindy days. He was green with envy knowing that his little brother gets to visit all those places.

Is this disrespect?

This post appeared on 19 April 2009 in my lost blog. Here is a reposting.

Hoe related to me an incident in school. Well, he didn't actually volunteer the information to me. We were talking about a particular subject and he came to the part of how he got lectured lengthily by his English teacher for his discipline problem of which Hoe already received his punishment earlier. As to why was the English teacher so concerned and spent so much time reprimanding students in an area where the teacher has no control of or something not within his jurisdiction? Only the teacher would know of his own agenda. Why would he want to waste time harping on the issue instead of teaching the students?


Anyway, back to Hoe. He told me that he really couldn't stand his English teacher's long nagging that he raised his hand and said,'Teacher, we got your point already.' This bold statement received a fierce stare from his teacher (he was lucky that he didn't get any physical reprimand!) but effectively terminated his sermon.

After a while, Hoe was signalled to see the English teacher at his desk in the classroom. Hoe was asked the occupation of both his parents. I hope this interrogation would be the end of this episode.


Hoe's rationale for vocalising those bold statements to his English teacher was that he was already punished by the discipline teacher although he was not the culprit. He was unlucky that he was locked in the toilet (along with his two other friends) cubicle and was frantically banging the door when he was spotted by the discipline teacher who happened to pass by. Banging on the toilet door was seen as creating havoc. Hoe couldn't prove much to defend himself as the culprit had already gotten off scot-free. Talking about justice!

Who's happier when holidays are coming?

Hooray! Today is the last school day of the third term.  Monday onwards, there will be

• no screaming at the kids to wake up for morning tuition class or school
• no need to chauffeur Wyng for tuition as the tutor normally gives advance additional classes so as to take a break during school holidays.
• no stressing over whether the kids have done their school or tuition homework.
• no rushing to prepare early lunch for Wyng and worry about whether he gets well-fed before he goes to school.
• no need to be a pest and plead to the kids to hit the sack early for school the next day
• no waking up early to cook breakfast for Hoe as he goes to school in the morning
• no need to remind Wyng to pack his school bag and sharpen his pencils
• no yelling at Wyng for taking ages to shower in the bathroom
• lastly, Wyng can take his own sweet time at the dining table without Mom yelling at him to quickly finish his meals

God is always fair. To enjoy all the above, Mom has to bear with boisterousness at home simply because the kids will be at home.  All these for just a short one week but enough for Mom to destress and relax for a while.

Scratched in school



Ouch!! It hurts, Mom

His 'injuries' in school are not only confined to his limbs.  His face was not spared.  Here, he came back home with a scar on his face made by a pencil, much to the amazement of Mom. How could he have scratched his own face with a pencil? No result even after interrogation.

His compassionate teacher not only did not reprimand him, she took him to the office to have some ointment applied for fear of infection.  She felt pitiful for him and asked if it hurt.

Mom was so worried that this kind of accident might happen again (God knows how it happened!) that he was bombarded with a lecture on the damage of lead in his body and that he might have a permanent scar on his face if he is not careful.

Why does a kid behave like that?

He has such laid-back attitude. After coming back from school and his shower, he will have his lunch. Predictably, switching on the television is the next thing he will do. He doesn't even touch his schoolbag.
'Exam is just over' was his response when I asked him to revise. Surprisingly, there is no homework too. Was it a lie or an excuse to defer doing his homework? When even television is disallowed, he will hit the sack for his afternoon nap.

The scenario is typical if this guy has no homework (as claimed by him) and will last at least a week or two right after his exam.

How much influence does a mother has on her kid's behaviour or attitude? Hasn't diligence always been inculcated since young? At their teenage now and the most rebellious stage of their life, are parents to be blamed if they fare badly in exam or 'misbehave'?

Good job

Just like his growth chart, he is within the top 10 percentile in his school in terms of academic performance this time. He scored an average of 92%, ranking 11th out of 218 students. He has improved by only about 5% in average score but jumped from a position of 67 last year.

For his commendable improvement, Mummy has promised to buy him a Transformer robot which he demanded to have it on the same day he brought home the report book. We finally agreed that he will get it only during the weekend when we take him to the store.

Filthy kid

Did he look like he has just come out from a coal mine? Or has just completed his art painting session, with his knees? The answer is none of both.

He had just come back from school. He got filthier by the day. He has loads of reasons when questioned for coming back in such filth.

'We sat on the floor' which means dirty pants.

'Teacher asked us to walk on our knees during PE' which means dirt-stained knees.

He couldn't explain 'black' palms except that he must have crawled on the floor, or worse still, lied on the floor as his t-shirt was not spared from the dirt.